CPSIA – Taking Advice from Idiots

In a recent article entitled “Advice on avoiding a toxic Christmas“, USA Today attempted to take Christmas paranoia to new heights. Naturally, the premise of the article is that companies are criminally irresponsible or venal and certainly can’t be trusted, and consumer advocates and any pediatrician that will talk to a reporter are better people, better informed and by definition trustworthy. In this article, USA Today’s Liz Szabo consults “experts” to reach the following conclusions:

a. “No one knows how much lead people absorb from holiday decorations, says pediatrician Bruce Lanphear, of Canada’s Simon Fraser University.” And if he said it, it must be true. [Of course, pediatrician Philip Landrigan, of Mount Sinai School of Medicine in New York, notes "In the whole scheme of things, is it a huge risk? No."]

What’s the problem with Xmas lights, you say? Lead in the PVC. According to Alicia Voorhiess, a mom with a blog, manufacturers “use it” in the PVC. Right – you got us! Don’t worry, though, after much digging, she found two companies that offer Xmas lights which comply with Restriction of Hazardous Substances (RoHS), a European standard which limits the presence of lead in lights.

Ummm, Alicia, RoHS is a standard to designed to prevent leaching of heavy metals to protect the environment and only applies to electronics. This MEANS that the lead is restricted in the bulbs and fittings, not the PVC. Whatever, it sounds safer, doesn’t it?

The author of the article quotes Dr. Alan Greene (my college classmate) saying that you should handle your Xmas lights with gloves. Why stop there? Moon suits, anyone?

b. Artificial Christmas trees are made of PVC, too, and we know what manufacturers are wont to do with PVC. The solution – use a real tree grown without pesticides.

I find this a most uncreative solution, myself. Here’s a few more:

• Post a picture of a beautiful tree near the spot you might have placed your tree. Keep it away from the fire, however.
• Consider just displaying your Xmas lights in their packaging. No touching!
• Use an artificial tree, but place under a glass enclosure or something air tight like Saran Wrap. Stand at least five feet away at all times.

All of these remedies will protect you from lead. That said, please remember there is NO safe level for lead. And a holy, jolly Christmas to you, too!

Shame that USA Today didn’t focus in on the fact that there is lead in the air, in our water and in our food. OOPSIE! In fact, lead in water is conveniently piped into Washington, D.C. homes for kids to drink in their own bathrooms and kitchens. Nice! Somehow USA Today missed this. Shocking . . . .

c. Candles with metal wicks might also have lead in them, or then again, maybe they won’t. In a blow to poorly-researched newspaper articles, the CPSC apparently banned these wicks in 2003. Who knew the CPSC actually tried to its job before the CPSIA? Somebody should have told Congress.

According to this all-knowing newspaper, candles also contain paraffin, a wax made from petroleum. Not sure why I should care about that, but it sounds ominous. And some fragrances in candles have phthalates in them “which can affect the hormonal system”. Isn’t knowing nothing about science FUN???

The solution – The author of this article actually recommends that you use pure beeswax candles. Happy hunting! They also suggest you “poke cloves into oranges”. Ah, the old clove poking trick! That sounds like fun but IS IT SAFE? This article says oranges have lead in them. NO! And, for an extra kicker, it also says they have cadmium, too: “If the soils contain toxic metals like lead, mercury and cadmium then the consumers may be poisoned as happened in the “Ouchi-ouchi” disease in Japan . . . and similar episodes.” Wow, Ouchi-Ouchi! Scott Wolfson, do you hear a bell ringing? [Eating oranges didn't cause "Ouchi-Ouchi" but then again, researching these things is sooooo time-consuming.]

So there you go. Skip Christmas this year, too dangerous. I wonder if a Festivus pole is lead-free . . . .

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CPSIA – Taking Advice from Idiots

CPSIA – Are Toys Supposed To Be Fun Anymore?

In a wonderful Op-Ed last week, Windsor Mann lampoons the ridiculous CPSIA by announcing his intent to not give any presents this year. His plan is as simple as the subtitle of his essay: “Giving children what they need most – nothing”. Mr. Mann expands: “As someone who loves to be a wonderful person for a brief period of time, I enjoy this season of temporary giving. I am obsessed with helping people, especially children, and the best way to help children is by not giving them Christmas presents.”

Sadly, Mr. Mann observes that “toys are not something to play around with”, noting the recent recall of toy darts because an 8-year-old almost choked on a dart that he was chewing. This is a real case. [This recall is eerily similar to a life-imitates-art spoof on The Onion entitled "Fun Toy Banned Because Of Three Stupid Dead Kids".]

Mr. Mann recounts in hilarious fashion various recent recalls illustrating the fact that we seem to have lost sight of what constitutes safety. [He even mentions the unfortunate Timberland ankle-high boots recalled for the lead-in-paint logo on their insoles.] To make his point, Mr. Mann notes the useful instructions provided by the CPSC in its “The Super Sitter” manual for babysitters. Here’s some tips the government felt the need to give babysitters:

• “Keep the youngsters safe by preventing accidents.”
• “Running or horseplay on [stairs] can lead to falls.”
• “In the event of accidental choking, apply first aid measures to clear the child’s airway.”

He quips: “(In the event of intentional choking, do not apply first aid measures.)”

The fear of everything, railed at in this essay, is the philosophical underpinning of the misconceived CPSIA. There is no solution to this disease short of changing the law. In a world dominated by the fear of everything, nothing is safe and everything must be feared. Mr. Mann’s strategy of not giving gifts seems to be an appropriate response in this environment.

It’s a funny article, but it’s not a funny problem for those of us stubborn enough to remain in the children’s product market. I don’t know how it comes as a surprise to anyone that misuse of products or the absence of individual responsibility may result in injuries, but that plague has descended on our industries. The issues inherent in this shift away from common sense are many:

• Fear of liability creates a perception of COST that deters investment in products and markets. Random costs feed the fear.
• Unjustified fear of injury by consumers translates into lower sales or higher costs in making sales. Markets shrink. Consumer needs become difficult to meet.
• An atmosphere of fear affects regulators, who tend to recall more often and to assess more penalties (even if non-monetary) because it’s politically-expedient or follows the trend. In other words, it’s “safer” for regulators to err on the side of caution – but that cost is borne by somebody . . . businesspeople.
• Rules tighten illogically, diverting attention from real issues, increasing the cost of participating in the market. All parties suffer from the consequences of complexity, including regulators.
• Misallocation of resources (expending too much energy on unimportant things) leads eventually to true crisis, fueling the fire of the original proponents of the legislation. The obvious solution – even MORE government.

And the joke will be on you and on us, if we don’t do something about it. Mr. Mann takes a lighthearted swipe at the silliness of your Congress, but it’s really no laughing matter.

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CPSIA – Are Toys Supposed To Be Fun Anymore?